Don’t fight hate with hate

We’ve all been there, we’ve all been thirsty for revenge, we’ve all wanted to fight fire with fire at some point of our lives. Because some people are just so awful, some people hurt you so bad that you can’t stand the thought of not getting payback. But that’ll only satisfy you for a few minutes. And you’ll feel guilty for the rest of your life. You’ll either feel guilty for them or for you. Because fighting hate with hate hurts you too, you know. It’s one of the things that wash away your inner peace.

I’m sure you’re all familiar with the quote Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. 

Can you take a moment to really, genuinely think about it. Acknowledge it. I, personally, believe it’s 100% true. Sometimes you just have to walk away. Actually, you always  (mostly) have to walk away when it comes to this specific topic. But before you walk away, remember one good thing about the person who hurt you, do something kind for them, try to forgive them. Just try, if you can’t- it’s not on you. Then go on with your life. Don’t move on with hatred that’ll weigh you down. Truly let it go. Because only then you’ll be truly happy.

Before you turn into someone you’ll regret being, take a moment, breathe, and walk away. Because when you’re in a situation that you want to fight and kick and scream, the person that you want to get revenge on so badly is probably someone who wants to get a reaction out of you, it would probably get on their nerves if you walked away and left him/her hanging.

BUT then again, sometimes you just really need to get it out there. Sometimes you need to set the record straight and confront someone with whatever they’re doing wrong, just say it exactly like it is. Let them know you’re not someone to mess with. Let them know you are not weak like they believe.

Although some people really need to be put in their places and some situations are unforgivable, that is definitely not what today’s post is about. Example: abuse. No, I’m not gonna tell you to forgive and be kind. But I am gonna tell you to be smart and turn to justice. And it is not in any way your responsibility to forgive, it’s not you to blame, nothing’s on you – all on the abuser.

So I guess it’s really a matter of picking your fights. If it’s not worth it, if it isn’t bothering you that much, if you could probably just walk away and ignore it and that will be just fine by you- do it. But if it’s hurting you in any form, confront the person. Because there are some words that just need to be said. And no one is going to say them for you. So get up, muster up the courage, and get the words out. Maybe there’s another side to the story or maybe the story ends here.

Either way, never fight hate with hate, cause that’s a) as childish as it is hurtful b) you never know what other people are going through, or what their side of the story is, and c) it hurts you too, as I said, it washes off your inner peace and leaves you feeling heavy.

So be the better one, not for anyone else, but for you.

Rock on.



  1. Hi Jana, I’ve just discovered your blog! I agree with you on this, but another tip I have is to never keep it to yourself. I did for months and it doesn’t do you any good xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Heyy! I’m so glad you do. YES! Definitely. Letting it out is always so much better than keeping it to yourself. I hope you’re doing better now! Did you talk to anyone about what you’re going through?


  2. This such a great post! I have recently gone through a really big fight with a friend and I had to do everything in my power to take the high road, but I am immensely happy that I did. Also I love the MLK quote!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s